I know that as Christians we are to have total faith and not ask Why something happens, I know God is in control of all things but it sure hard to not ask why. I believe that it is human nature to have these feelings, and I really don't know the answer but I continue to put my faith in the Lord even though I may not understand why something is happening.
Today a young man who I started babysitting when he was six was hospitalized after fighting cancer for the past eleven months, it is throughout his body. Last week a amazing woman of God was in the hospital fighting an infection caused by her cancer, In the past few month Laurie who I have cared for for 17 years has taken another downward shift and is now 90% blind 70% deaf and is struggling in so many other areas, in April a man of God who I loved deeply passed away after a very short battle with cancer, and two weeks ago my uncle who I love like my own father was diagnosed with mid stage Alzheimer's, all this on top of me having total shoulder replacement which has proven to be a very difficult recovery.
I look at all of these things and I just want to hide,scream or cry, I feel like the ones who walk with the Lord and have this amazing faith are the ones who get tested, I know that I need to just give it to the Lord but instead I find myself in a puddle of tears all to often.
I think of Brandon and what a testament of living his faith he has been and I think back to papa Jack shared the word with anyone who would listen right up to the end, and I think of Laurie and I wonder what it is like to not be able to see or hear and yet I get so frustrated because I feel overwhelmed by having to do everything for her. There are so many more people hurting and stories of amazing Christians who have lived their faith to the end.
I always wonder why this person, and then I wonder how do you support people who are going through something so devastating and I guess the best thing you can do is be there and to shower them in prayer. I know that sometimes I need people to help me with Laurie to give me a break and to encourage me on days when I feel like I ma failing.
I was talking with my mom and dad this week because they lost a son, and I asked them how they got through it and what was the biggest encouragement that they had during that time, and they both said knowing that people all around the world were praying, and knowing they did not have to go through it alone. I keep thinking of this and I think of my parents who continued to serve even through a time of great grief and sorrow. I wonder do I have this kind of faith? I have been struggling with the situation with Laurie and wondering if I will be able to keep her here in the home or if I will have to place her in more specialized care, and I feel selfish every time I think about moving her because I am having a hard time caring for her, but maybe there is more I can do.
I feel so overwhelmed and I just want to send this why out into the world, I know that God had a plan for each of us long before we were born and that he knew all of our fears and struggles, before time began.
I came home from a special prayer time tonight for Brandon and his family and I was brought back to two of my favorite passages Ephesians 6:10-13 and James 1:2-3
so I Will leave you with this find your faith in the Lord because he is the only one strong enough to carry us through the difficult times and then put on the armor of God and stand against the forces of evil that try tear down believer when trials hit. I am sure I will have to be reminded again and again but I pray I can have faith through all the trails of life
Today a young man who I started babysitting when he was six was hospitalized after fighting cancer for the past eleven months, it is throughout his body. Last week a amazing woman of God was in the hospital fighting an infection caused by her cancer, In the past few month Laurie who I have cared for for 17 years has taken another downward shift and is now 90% blind 70% deaf and is struggling in so many other areas, in April a man of God who I loved deeply passed away after a very short battle with cancer, and two weeks ago my uncle who I love like my own father was diagnosed with mid stage Alzheimer's, all this on top of me having total shoulder replacement which has proven to be a very difficult recovery.
I look at all of these things and I just want to hide,scream or cry, I feel like the ones who walk with the Lord and have this amazing faith are the ones who get tested, I know that I need to just give it to the Lord but instead I find myself in a puddle of tears all to often.
I think of Brandon and what a testament of living his faith he has been and I think back to papa Jack shared the word with anyone who would listen right up to the end, and I think of Laurie and I wonder what it is like to not be able to see or hear and yet I get so frustrated because I feel overwhelmed by having to do everything for her. There are so many more people hurting and stories of amazing Christians who have lived their faith to the end.
I always wonder why this person, and then I wonder how do you support people who are going through something so devastating and I guess the best thing you can do is be there and to shower them in prayer. I know that sometimes I need people to help me with Laurie to give me a break and to encourage me on days when I feel like I ma failing.
I was talking with my mom and dad this week because they lost a son, and I asked them how they got through it and what was the biggest encouragement that they had during that time, and they both said knowing that people all around the world were praying, and knowing they did not have to go through it alone. I keep thinking of this and I think of my parents who continued to serve even through a time of great grief and sorrow. I wonder do I have this kind of faith? I have been struggling with the situation with Laurie and wondering if I will be able to keep her here in the home or if I will have to place her in more specialized care, and I feel selfish every time I think about moving her because I am having a hard time caring for her, but maybe there is more I can do.
I feel so overwhelmed and I just want to send this why out into the world, I know that God had a plan for each of us long before we were born and that he knew all of our fears and struggles, before time began.
I came home from a special prayer time tonight for Brandon and his family and I was brought back to two of my favorite passages Ephesians 6:10-13 and James 1:2-3
so I Will leave you with this find your faith in the Lord because he is the only one strong enough to carry us through the difficult times and then put on the armor of God and stand against the forces of evil that try tear down believer when trials hit. I am sure I will have to be reminded again and again but I pray I can have faith through all the trails of life
I'm praying for you Ang. Thanks for being a great friend.
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